Ragged....

what is a piece of ragged cloth to you?....a valuable piece of cloth that served its purpose and now its worn and torn?...a piece of useless junk that you can discard it whenever you feel like it?....the same concept is applied in life....there are those that only treat that piece of junk as something valuable when they need to clean a dirty table or a chair...if not it would just be a worthless piece of cloth to them....so to clarify things....im a piece of ragged cloth where you only appreciate me when you need it...otherwise you will just ignore and discard me at a corner with no concern about my feelings at all....so...FUCK YOU....oOo.....

Friends - birthday post...

friends...a word that is made out of 7 simple alphabets...yet there is an extraordinary meaning behind this 7 alphabet word...we might not realize it but we have learned the meaning of the word since young...we categorize people whom we like and people whom we dont like...you...the girl who is cute...you are my friend....come play with me....but you...the one that suck your finger...its disgusting...you are not my friend..you dont get to play hide and seek with me...as we grow older...we come to realize that friendship is not as simple as that..it requires effort...in fact...tons of endless effort....that needs time..and you need to pour yourself into it for it to grow...and as we grow older..we see different friends come and go...we learn the boundary of friendship...we came to realize how far would my suppose bff go for me?...do you even draw a line of intimacy between two friends?....how do you keep it going for ever?...i would love to have these answers..and i would be a very wise man if i could take the answers and apply them to my life....but sadly...im baffled when it comes to questions like that....where do you place your friends on the scale of priorities?...behind the girlfriend?..in front of the family?...equal to all your friends?....a step above your academics?...you decide...and you tell me..what is more important to you....but for me..i will tell you that friends are in front of the family...a step above academics...and equal standing to a girl...however im no saint...im biased...i put my all friends on a different scale...i do not treat them equally..there are definitely those that matters...and there are definitely those that i would go an extra mile for....and i believe that this holds true for almost everyone...you cant treat everyone equally...at some point there will be those that you favor more compare to others...and those that you treat as bff...do they treat you the same?...or are you just a fool who got tricked to do their bidding...its a scary truth...those of us that are lucky got the better of friendship and they found their bff who would go as far as they could for them...and those of us that are unlucky...got tricked and fooled....and all thats left was nothing but a pool of despair and anger.....i am a very blunt person..brute perhaps...but its something that i find pride in....over the years id say that ive become more tactful...more diplomatic about confrontations...but there is stil an element of the harshness that dictate my way of speech and words...those who understand me will know that i wouldnt use that harshness unless i cared...those that are unworthy of my time..i would not have bothered to make you feel terrible about the way you have been....some might say that its cruel...and its not the right way to go about things...but then..all the more reason to show that i care..dont i?
i try to be a good friend..or the perfect friend so to speak...one who is understanding..one who stays in the shadow to support you...but as with all things in life...doing the right things is often harder than doing the wrong things...it is easier to get angry than to be patient when they annoy you...or when they dont reply your text..msn...o even phone calls....it is easier to be expectant than to be selfless...there will always be a part of you that hope what you did before will be rewarded....and we will fail...we will fall harder than before...despite our good intentions...we will be misjudged...and we will be forsaken....in story books or movies...the ending usually portrays a character who gives up his life or something important to him for someone else...and the script writer often focus on the fact that the person he gives his life to never reward him or gives him the appreciation he deserves...and the character would be ok with it...tragic?...very much so...and i often ask myself..would i be able to do that?..will i be able to be the friend that goes on loving..that goes on supporting even when the friend you are loving and supporting push you away..and blame you for their shortcomings....will i be able to be the friend that never utter a word of retaliation when the friend that you give up everything for lashes back and hurts you?....until this moment i hope to be...but sadly..im not...but that is a friend that i hope to become...i know im not there yet...but i will try my very best...
this post was meant to be a birthday greetings for someone that matters....so before this post turned into an emo post or an angry post...i shall pause and take a moment to say that...i might have wrong you in the past without noticing it...for that im sorry...but i will not apologize for being blunt and brute as you might call me...cause i am who i am..and i cared...but i dont mind you nudging me so that i would not stray off the righteous path..now its to give thanks and say that im glad that you were born today....you might not be the perfect friend..but i will say that you are halfway there....so this is from me..all the best...and happy birthday....

Lies...

lies....its the opposite of truth....the people around us...how many of them are really truthful and how many of them are just hoax ...i believe its a question with no definite answer....reason being some people are fantastic liars and no one could tell whether he is lying or being truthful....
yes...its undeniable that there are white lies and lies out there...some might say its ok to lie once in a while to slide through stuff..some might disagree cause lying is wrong no matter what you say...a lie is a lie....personally..i would agree with both...lying is wrong no matter what...a lie is a lie..but sometimes u just need that small white lie to get through stuff...but what happens when you lie and someone else caught you doing so...you just have to tell more lies to cover up your previous lies?....aint that kinda ridiculous....the lies would snowball and at the end..there is someone that is bound to be HURT....instead of telling more lies...why cant they just admit and confess they lied when they were caught..wont that solve all the problem?....its as simple as that...yes..some might be afraid to tell the truth...cause the truth is hard...in general..everything that is righteous is hard...and its not that hard when you start...its as simple as that...confess....there is no need for more lies...but when you thought of it in a deeper manner...why would they lie in the first place...i believe this is a question that only the liar can answer....is it because they are afraid to let other people know that they broke a promise?....is it because they are afraid that people might find out they are nothing but a hoax?....is it because of bad influence?..is it because they are afraid that when you find out...they can no longer manipulate you to get stuff that they want?....its a scary thought....until this instant you do not know they people you are with are genuine or not...lies...its something that is not tolerable no matter what....the only way you can gain retribution from a lie is by telling the truth...

Xmas Play...

yes..i know..it has been a while...but im double posting to make up for the long absence....went to see the CF's play earlier today...or i should say yesterday by the time im done writing this post....it was magnificent as always..there were a few flaws here and there...but im not going to complain..cause none of us are professional actors...they are just a bunch of multi talented students that gave up their precious time to do that play and entertain the crowd...so two thumbs up for them...i must say it was a really good play...the best actor award i would give it to the dad...somehow he is a good actor and he has a great voice...he pronounce english words with a very nice slang and he can really sing...so i think he deserve an award....now for best actress..i would say the matron...reason why she deserves this is because she manage to pull off her character flawlessly...she played an antagonist character in the play..and its not easy to pull off an antagonist character...and like the best actor..she can really sing...haha..seriously CF deserves a round of applause...they manage to find so many talents....XD....and if there was also a best line award..i would say the best line in the play..the line which i remembered the most was in one of the parody of taylor swift's song they did...he wears slippers and i wear leather..that got me drop dead laughing.....overall..it was a successful play...i might even say successful is abit underated....hehe...well...i must thank shaun for the awesome company earlier...XD...and hopfully you can make up your mind soon enough...

-Josh-

Everything that matters...

Find me here
And speak to me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That is leading me
To the place where
I find peace again
You are the strength
That keeps me walking
You are the hope
That keeps me trusting
You are the life to my soul
You are my purpose
You're everything

And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this

You calm the storms
You give me rest
You hold me in your hands
You won't let me fall
You steal my heart
And you take my breath away
Would you take me in
Would you take me deeper now

And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this


-Josh-

Cloud 9...

cloud 9...that is the term that best describe what i feel right now...i just feel so great...thanks to the pillar...haha...i guess only the pillar would understand when he reads this...i would still prefer to call him pole..but he insisted that he is a pillar...it was a pleasant weekend with a lot of unexpected twist..but somehow everything turned out way better than ok..in fact..everything turned out to be great...it was some quality time spent...there are many things that we cant do...for example both of us cant write a 1119 standard essay..but i guess what it matters is that we really did pour our all in it..i guess that is the reason why it feels so great....everything is so genuine...it is something that would last a lifetime...so..thanks for everything....my own support pillar..XD.....